rob-tombrady:

Sometimes I will have an idea for a joke or I’ll come up with late at night or I’ll jot something down first thing in the morning when I wake up and have no idea what it means later. Here are ten of those half written tweets that I will never finsih.

1. Orlando Bloom as Legolas in my ass…

54 notes

rob-tombrady:

Sometimes I will have an idea for a joke or I’ll come up with late at night or I’ll jot something down first thing in the morning when I wake up and have no idea what it means later. Here are ten of those half written tweets that I will never finsih.

1. Orlando Bloom as Legolas in my ass…

54 notes

Your Welcome

Hey Guys. Chicks are up for nookie almost as often as you are. But she has to know that you aren’t out *just* to nail her..Here’s a test as to whether or not she likes you enough to nail you. (or do this, and she will) Go to a house party…both of you get drunk…if you don’t push yourself on her, and actually help her sleep(cuddle, what have you) you are in. Really not that hard to wait the extra 24 hours to get respectable pussy for life, now is it??

REALLY???

I’m hoping Twitter being down for the National Lampoon Twitter Awards is part of an opening joke or some shit.

funnyordie:

NFL Week 4 Recap: Are You Ready for Some Obama/Hitler Comparisons?!
Hank Williams Jr. made an ass out of himself. But he wasn’t alone. 
Talk about a Scapegoat…

funnyordie:

NFL Week 4 Recap: Are You Ready for Some Obama/Hitler Comparisons?!

Hank Williams Jr. made an ass out of himself. But he wasn’t alone. 

Talk about a Scapegoat…

55 notes

dolcegabbana:

Backstage @ Dolce&Gabbana SS12 Woman Fashio Show

dolcegabbana:

Backstage @ Dolce&Gabbana SS12 Woman Fashio Show

126 notes

criminalwisdom:


Infographic: The ever expanding death toll in Mexico’s sprawling drug war

(Source: National Post)

criminalwisdom:

Infographic: The ever expanding death toll in Mexico’s sprawling drug war

(Source: National Post)

164 notes

The Worst Pick-Up Line Ever

drunkbastardradio:

How about we go back to my place?  There won’t be anyone there.  I’ll turn the lights down low, put a little mood music on, maybe some Zeppelin, “You Shook Me,” we can both get naked and I’ll fill a bathtub full of warm baked beans, we’ll get in, and I’ll slap your tittes silly with a monkfish.  Whaddaya say?

This hasn’t worked yet.

Yet.

5 notes